When did I let my life become so mundane? I feel at the moment like I wake up, go to work, come home, go to bed, repeat. And somewhere along the line, I've forgotten that I'm actually living. I've allowed myself to stop thinking, to stop reflecting , to stop really breathing.
I realised tonight something so precious that I can't believe I ever forgot it. I'm alive. I'm breathing in the air around me. I exist. When you actually slow down enough to realise that, when you manage to tear yourself away from the mundane life long enough to know that- it is absolutely breathtaking. I can be anything, I can go anywhere, I am free, I exist.
Don't let me ever forget that.
It carries some of the essence of what Jesus said when he says:
It carries some of the essence of what Jesus said when he says:
"do not worry about your life" "do not worry about tomorrow" "seek first the kingdom of God".
I find those words so fresh and releasing. So simple when I make things so complicated. At times I get so caught up in my life that I forget I'm actually living, sometimes I get so caught up in the future- where I will be, how I will get by, that I forget who I really am. And Jesus is frank about it- do not worry. Live. Exist.
It is so easy to get through weeks, months, years without really living. It isn't about traveling the world or becoming successful- it isn't about eating the most exquisite food or reading more books. It is about taking in every last drop of life- savoring every moment for what it is; realising that life is too short to live for anything other than the present.
Ultimately life is fickle. Tomorrow is always too far away. It's not long enough until I'm married, until I have enough money, until we have a decent government. The truth is that there will always be another excuse to not really live; there will always be something not right. But ultimately the future is only a distraction from how amazing the present is, on how exhilarating life could be if we dared to really live.
This might be my last blog. This might be my last breath. If it is, at least I will go appreciating life for what it is, knowing that I am alive now and that is truly the most remarkable thing.
Hi Josh!! Hope youre well. Just to say I really loved this blogg, and it reminded me of something I read recently by James Fraser, a missionary to China. This has a slightly more work oriented slant though. He said
ReplyDelete"It is all "If" and "When". I believe the devil is fond of those conjunctions... The plain truth is that the Scriptures never teach us to wait for opportunities of service, but to serve in just the things that lie next to our hands.. The Lord bid us work, watch and pray; but Satan suggests, wait until a good opportunity for working watching and praying presents itself - and needless to say, this opportunity is always in the future.. Since the things that lie in our immediate path have been ordered of God, who shall say that one kind of work is more important and sacred than another?"
Like you, Im sick of waiting for something and it stealing my joy of the present. For you what would "living for the present" practically mean?
Lets constantly be praising God for our very existence. I exist. wow. :-)
Bye!!